Thursday, October 27, 2011

Worst Horror Movie Clichés Ever!

1. Hockey Masked Killers:
This cliché unfairly tarnishes the upstanding reputation of hockey which has never been associated with violence in any way.  The combination of hockey and violence are simply unimaginable.

2. Death While Taking A Shower:
This is just a shameless way to gratuitously show sexy plumbing fixtures.  The plumbing industrial complex pays Hollywood studios to display plumbing products in their movies to subliminally advertise hot, exposed pipes.

3. The Supernatural:
Demons, goblins, and evil spirits are silly hokum and do not exist.  They were ghostbusted to extinction years ago.

4. The Twisted Genius Killer Who Outsmarts The Police:
Killers are not geniuses.  You'll never see a butcher who graduated from Harvard.  Harvard doesn't even offer a butcher degree.

5. Toxic Waste That Creates Monsters:
Toxic waste doesn't create monsters.  Toxic waste IS the monster.  (Paid for by the Anti-Toxic Waste Non-Industrial Complex)

6. Killing Sprees That Occur On Specific Holidays:
This is just a shameless way to remind people to buy Hallmark holiday cards... and to go on killing sprees.