Worst Donald Trump Projects Ever!

(by: FuntasticList.blogspot.com)

1. The Trump Sewage Processing Plant In Beautiful Atlantic City:
Since this gold-plated waste facility began operating, a record number of old men with metal detectors at the beach have found "treasure" consisting of toxic metals.  (Coincidence?  I think not!)

2. The Search For Barack Obama's Birth Certificate:
According to Trump: "I've made some incredible discoveries!  I discovered that Barack Obama has no library card!"

3. The "You're Fired!" Triangle Shirtwaist Factory:
Named after the infamous burned building and site of many tragic deaths, Trump shows his trademark "class."  (It's gold-plated to match the color of fire.)

4. The New Miss Universe Pageant:
It features Jabba the Hutt's wife representing planet Tatooine.

5. Donald Trump's Meticulously Constructed Comb Over:
You're not fooling anyone.

6. "Apprentice: Comb Over":
Learn from the master how to build a meticulously constructed comb over.

Worst Urban Legends Ever!

(by: FuntasticList.blogspot.com)

1. Waking Up In An Unfamiliar Hotel Room And Discovering That A Kidney Was Removed:
False.  They take half of the brain.  The half that dumb people don't use.

2. Santa Claus Evicted Superman From His Fortress Of Solitude Home At The North Pole:
When the Daily Planet went out of business, Clark Kent was unemployed and could no longer afford the rent.  Clark Kent had to sell his glasses too.

3. Richard Gere Wants To Marry A Gerbil That... (EUPHEMISM ALERT) Somehow Burrowed Into His Bikini Area:
The Dalai Lama will perform the marriage ceremony.

4. Walt Disney Was Cryogenically Frozen And Used To Cool The Booze Of An Alcoholic Mickey Mouse Depressed By The Death Of His Creator:
An alcoholic Mickey Mouse...  That would explain why Mickey Mouse is often shirtless.

5. Waking Up In An Unfamiliar Hotel Room And Discovering That A Finger On Each Hand Was Removed:
Mickey Mouse always wanted five fingers on each of his hands instead of four.  Mickey Mouse blames Walt Disney for this deformity.

6. An Alligator Living In the New York City Sewers Crawled Up A Toilet And Bit Donald Trump's Head Off (CORRECTION: Bit Donald Trump's Butt Off):
Common mistake given where most people think Trump's head is located.

7. Batman Contracted A Disease From Touching Bat Guano In The Batcave:
Now you know why Batman wears gloves.

Best Financial Disasters Ever!

(by: FuntasticList.blogspot.com)

1. The Bubblegum Bubble Burst Of 1929:
Bootleg liquor smugglers, swinging flappers, Dust Bowl farmers, and FDR were all covered by a thin layer of gum... which of course gummed up the economy for the next decade.

2. Prior To Bernie Madoff's Pyramid Scheme Collapsing, Madoff's Lesser Known Octagon Scheme Went Belly Up.

3. The Explosion Of The "Star Wars" Death Star:
According to "Robot Chicken," the Emperor hadn't even made all the payments on it yet.  But don't worry, TARP bailed him out.

4. The Explosion Of The "Star Wars: Return Of The Jedi" Death Star 2:
TARP 2.  It's a good thing the galaxy has so many taxpayers.

5. When A Bird Landed On Richie Rich's Solid Gold Mansion, Exceeding the Weight Limit Of The Ground Below:
This resulted in the mansion sinking to the center of the earth with Richie Rich trapped inside.  (Hooray for gravity!)

6. The Downgrading Of The U.S. Debt Rating:
This will increase interest rates for loans, making it impossible to build Death Star 3.  (We love "Star Wars" but 6 movies are enough.)